I used to be good at relaxing and just pausing and enjoying the passing of time. But I noticed that since my daughter's birth I have lost that ability. I realise how wrong that sounds, but it's the truth. She is now 10 and I am trying to go back to my old ways :) because I want her to learn to be ok with doing nothing - no screen, no being entertained, nothing. Because I realise how important that is. It's good to be busy, but only if you're also good at doing nothing. Otherwise, it just leads to exhaustion and illness. But it's not easy...
Love this post, it is funny how hard it can be to relax into relaxing. Boredom can be a bitch until we can learn how to relax and be at peace with that boredom. It's good to remember that some of the best ideas are born in times of boredom too 😊
This is a beautiful reflection! I’m so touched that my writing resonated and love reading about the many blooms in your bouquet of time (German almond cake! No knead bread! Marigolds! I’m right there with you in my free time!). I had surgery a year ago and gave myself plenty of time to recuperate, which felt like such a proper luxury. And I’m slow to reply to your writing because I was offline for the weekend to mark that surgery anniversary by taking a class at a folk school in way northern Minnesota with a girlfriend friend going in for surgery later this week. I guess my point is that our physical reality is sometimes the excuse for rest and following the flow of time to remember what sparks joy. I wish you the best in your healing and rehabilitation. ✨
Rest time feels so hard! I’ve been sick for the last week and have really struggled to let me body and mind rest. As soon as I tested positive I began mentally listing all the things I could do with this extra time. Instead, I have continued to work. I could take a leaf from your book. All the best with the thumb recovery. Maybe I can see you in Perth? I’ll be there in two weeks time for two weeks
Oh Meg, I'm sorry you've been sick. And haven't you just come back from a retreat? Maybe your body is sending you rest messages ... mine does and it amps up if I don't listen! Yes, it really is hard to rest when you are conditioned to work but also when you have work that needs to be done. I really get that. I hope you can use some of that extra time to catch up with yourself.
And yes, I'd love to try to make it happen. (I've sent you a FB request so we can message).
I’m one of those people who feels like they have a be ‘doing’ all the time. I know it’s not healthy, and I know I shouldn’t listen to that little voice in my head telling me I’m slack for taking time for me.
But you know, whenever I take time for myself, it’s easier than the last time. When I’m out for a walk in the bush, instead of pounding along the track the whole way, I’ll sit on a log for a few minutes & listen to nature. I try and make the effort to step outside at sunset and watch the last glorious colours of the day descend behind the trees. And sometimes just the simple pleasure of watching the steam drift off my Earl Grey in the morning for a few minutes.
You do so much more in your quiet time then I achieve in a normal week!! I am always tired so that any spare time I have is used for nanapping and I am feelng less guilty for having these naps now but wishing they weren't so necessary (recovering from complications after hip replacement surgery). Even after 2 naps today where I was caught snoring I am nodding off while typing and I still have emails to answer before I can go to bed and prepare for the busy week that starts tomorrow.
Oh Ruth, I'm sorry you're still feeling the fatigue and complications from hip replacement, that must be hard for you. It sounds like your body is telling you it needs more rest, despite the busy to-do list. I know that frustration of trying to decide whether the "busy" can wait or not.
It does sound like I did a lot, but some of the things were less taxing than others and probably sound "bigger" than they were. For me, it was about doing things that weren't "work" and helped me to slow down in a way I could handle. The puzzles and the painting became also like meditation for me, a moving meditation of sorts. I didn't think about much else while I was doing them.
Great post on a very relevant topic! Thanks for sharing your experience. I wrote a similar post last year, a sort of rant against routines and paean to spontaneity, and it actually has a similar structure to yours, with a list at the end of what I ended up doing instead of routines. I’m sharing it below.
Love the idea of wallowing in puddles of time!
I used to be good at relaxing and just pausing and enjoying the passing of time. But I noticed that since my daughter's birth I have lost that ability. I realise how wrong that sounds, but it's the truth. She is now 10 and I am trying to go back to my old ways :) because I want her to learn to be ok with doing nothing - no screen, no being entertained, nothing. Because I realise how important that is. It's good to be busy, but only if you're also good at doing nothing. Otherwise, it just leads to exhaustion and illness. But it's not easy...
Love this post, it is funny how hard it can be to relax into relaxing. Boredom can be a bitch until we can learn how to relax and be at peace with that boredom. It's good to remember that some of the best ideas are born in times of boredom too 😊
This is a beautiful reflection! I’m so touched that my writing resonated and love reading about the many blooms in your bouquet of time (German almond cake! No knead bread! Marigolds! I’m right there with you in my free time!). I had surgery a year ago and gave myself plenty of time to recuperate, which felt like such a proper luxury. And I’m slow to reply to your writing because I was offline for the weekend to mark that surgery anniversary by taking a class at a folk school in way northern Minnesota with a girlfriend friend going in for surgery later this week. I guess my point is that our physical reality is sometimes the excuse for rest and following the flow of time to remember what sparks joy. I wish you the best in your healing and rehabilitation. ✨
Rest time feels so hard! I’ve been sick for the last week and have really struggled to let me body and mind rest. As soon as I tested positive I began mentally listing all the things I could do with this extra time. Instead, I have continued to work. I could take a leaf from your book. All the best with the thumb recovery. Maybe I can see you in Perth? I’ll be there in two weeks time for two weeks
Oh Meg, I'm sorry you've been sick. And haven't you just come back from a retreat? Maybe your body is sending you rest messages ... mine does and it amps up if I don't listen! Yes, it really is hard to rest when you are conditioned to work but also when you have work that needs to be done. I really get that. I hope you can use some of that extra time to catch up with yourself.
And yes, I'd love to try to make it happen. (I've sent you a FB request so we can message).
Guilty as charged 🫣
I’m one of those people who feels like they have a be ‘doing’ all the time. I know it’s not healthy, and I know I shouldn’t listen to that little voice in my head telling me I’m slack for taking time for me.
But you know, whenever I take time for myself, it’s easier than the last time. When I’m out for a walk in the bush, instead of pounding along the track the whole way, I’ll sit on a log for a few minutes & listen to nature. I try and make the effort to step outside at sunset and watch the last glorious colours of the day descend behind the trees. And sometimes just the simple pleasure of watching the steam drift off my Earl Grey in the morning for a few minutes.
Little gifts to me, from me 🙂
Thanks for sharing how you gift yourself time xx
Yes, I feel the same. If we allow the time, step by step it becomes less about guilt and more about growth.
PS. I have been known to drop everything because the colour on the brick wall outside tells me the sunset is not to be missed. Love those moments.
You do so much more in your quiet time then I achieve in a normal week!! I am always tired so that any spare time I have is used for nanapping and I am feelng less guilty for having these naps now but wishing they weren't so necessary (recovering from complications after hip replacement surgery). Even after 2 naps today where I was caught snoring I am nodding off while typing and I still have emails to answer before I can go to bed and prepare for the busy week that starts tomorrow.
Oh Ruth, I'm sorry you're still feeling the fatigue and complications from hip replacement, that must be hard for you. It sounds like your body is telling you it needs more rest, despite the busy to-do list. I know that frustration of trying to decide whether the "busy" can wait or not.
It does sound like I did a lot, but some of the things were less taxing than others and probably sound "bigger" than they were. For me, it was about doing things that weren't "work" and helped me to slow down in a way I could handle. The puzzles and the painting became also like meditation for me, a moving meditation of sorts. I didn't think about much else while I was doing them.
Feel better soon, Ruth XX
Loved reading your List! As if I did these things myself. Gute Besserung, Monique 🖤
Thank you, Tugba! I am recovering much better than I expected and I'm so grateful for that. But also grateful for the space to rest.
Great post on a very relevant topic! Thanks for sharing your experience. I wrote a similar post last year, a sort of rant against routines and paean to spontaneity, and it actually has a similar structure to yours, with a list at the end of what I ended up doing instead of routines. I’m sharing it below.
https://www.practicespace.blog/p/no-19-in-a-routine-rut